cagayan, cagayan

it's strange how i used to looove cagayan de oro. especially during my volunteer year. it was a welcome respite from my humdrum life in bukidnon where it was quiet and i was a semi-respectable teacher (wearing torn jeans kinda lowered the respectability level a bit).

in cagayan, i can doo-wop until morning and i don't have to care. and until now, i can still do that. except when you ride a rickety motorcycle for three hours through rocky roads then hike up and down for six hours in two days... doo-wopping is the last thing i'd like to do.

wish i can go to a spa and have a massage... except that would be pretty useless because i have to take another seven hour bus ride to home tomorrow.

it's friday in cagayan de oro. and that means night cafe. which means bustling energy that is about to burst at the seams. this is the kind of excitement i enjoy in davao during kadayawan. but an experience i don't need to have every week.

i see a bunch of very young boys out feeling like they're cool as cucumbers. then another bunch of non-boys in their skimpy shorts and padded bras parading in front of bars. on one side of the street, curlicues of smoke come from food roasting on the grill... and on the other side, the sounds of commerce as barter takes place between seller and haggler.

it's all so fun and vibrant. i wish i had the energy to take dixie out and snap away. but my mind and body is too pooped to do anything but check e-mail and do a quickie blog post... which is fast turning into a long entry.

and for quite a while now, i have been feeling distant to cagayan. i know i don't belong here anymore... that i am what i have always been -- a constant observer. today i realized i do not have the personality to be part of this city. but i have the energy to be a detached outsider... that the mere presence of cagayan keeps me awake beyond what my body can usually handle.

i should be sleeping right now... but there is something about cagayan that just prods my senses awake. and after this entry... am off to take a bit of walk and look around and check out the people and muse to myself, "what an interesting city."